You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
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i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
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He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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