ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
