I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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