I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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