gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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