i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
