I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
He passed out mid-signature
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
