So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Just high enough for therapy.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
