Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
