I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
