I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
