you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize