Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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