East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
