You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
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I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
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Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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