i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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