You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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