no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
