Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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