No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
