So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
