we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize