Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
