She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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