If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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