Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Randomize
