so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
