I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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