good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
