Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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