im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Randomize
