if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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