She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
