i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
