HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize