I have demons in me.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
