oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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