you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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