check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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