i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
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