oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
