At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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