there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize