Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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