Duck Duck Cougar?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
