what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
