i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
