He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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