i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
