Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
